You don’t have to conform to the crowd, be proud to be your own self. Graphic by Piper Bailey. 

MADDIE WOOD | OPINION EDITOR | mawood1@butler.edu 

Democrat or Republican. Religious or agnostic. Gay or straight. Tattooed or au naturel.

In today’s world, there is no one way to think, feel or believe, but there is paradoxically an unspoken rule that you have to somehow think, feel and believe just like everyone else. 

It’s been long believed that when you go against the grain — whether with your political views, religious beliefs, moral outlooks or the societal norm in general — you’re considered a rebel. Why is this the case?

Junior P1 pharmacy major Olivia Sigler finds it easier to conform to society. 

“If you’re super different from society, or the people you surround yourself with, then [fitting in] is really hard,” Sigler said. “You also stand out, and I don’t want to stand out. I just want to be a part of the crowd.” 

For most people, like Sigler, it seems like you are constantly being watched and judged on every tiny thing you do. It starts when you’re young and want to make friends, so you try to shape yourself to be just like everyone else. Over time, it continues to shape how you present yourself, despite championing individualism. Society loves to contradict itself, and this is a classic example.

Well, one thing I love to say is f*ck society. 

While society can be a harsh critic, nobody tears into you quite like your extended family at Thanksgiving dinner. Your loved ones think they know what is best for you when in reality they are just plain politically incorrect. 

Family is the first encounter where you might find yourself choosing between your own morals or “assimilating” to someone else’s.  

When you grow up with your family, you are naturally conditioned to think, feel, believe and even act the same as them. You’re with them constantly, most of the time they are your primary source of societal learning.

Over time, you may start to feel some of your values changing as you get older and you learn more about the world and yourself. 

Senior choral music education major Matt Heitkamp believes that the desire to fit in stems from the worry of standing out.  

“Assimilation [is] the idea of [wanting] to fit in,” Heitkamp said. “[It’s that fear] of not wanting to say how you feel about an issue, or a particular subject, without someone picking you apart or someone thinking less of you.” 

Heitkamp brings up that fear that we all have — being judged. Any time you voice your opinion, whether they agree or disagree, there is that chance that someone will be jumping on to immediately rip apart what you have to say. 

Sophomore exploratory studies major Alaina Webster explained how growing up can be the hardest time for your identity when you start to form your own sense of self. 

“You build up a persona around [certain] people, and it might be hard to change,” Webster said. “I used to be a much different kid, and when I started having my own thoughts and feelings, [the world] started to change around me.” 

Gen-Z is the most recent and prevalent case in which we have different beliefs and values than those who raised us. We are not afraid to speak out and be different, but if you think a little differently, you’re exiled from Gen-Z  — no matter how wrong or right they may think they are. 

Though I grew up in a household of multiple religions and very differing beliefs, my parents made it clear that they wanted me to grow up with my own thoughts and feelings. They never wanted me to live for anyone else but myself. Despite my sometimes conflicting values, they still loved me enough to respect my choices despite all of our differences. 

Since 2016 we’ve all been so caught up in the idea of being Democrat versus Republican, and it has quite literally torn families and friendships apart. After that election, what political party you identify with has become such a large part of who you are. It has become the make or break in multiple relationships.

Now it is more common to attack the other in political conversations rather than listen and understand. There is a fine line between discussion and argument but it has become more blurred as the past few years have gone on. If you want someone to believe in and understand their point of view, why wouldn’t you want to have a calm and civil conversation instead? Attacking and arguing doesn’t get you anywhere other than in more hot water than when you started.

I have been in countless arguments with my family, friends and even coworkers about politics over the past few years — arguments that even continue today. However, just because someone I love disagrees with me, that doesn’t mean I am willing to compromise on my own values and morals. 

You are allowed to be your own true self in life. You should be your own individual. You should believe what you want to believe and feel what you need to feel. There is nobody in this world who can tell you who or what you are — not even Sue Sylvester.

Stand up for what you believe in. Speak your mind. If the people around you love you, they’ll stay, and if they don’t, you’re probably better off without them anyway.