DOUGLAS ROCHE III | OPINION COLUMNIST | firstname.lastname@example.org
Spring Break is an exercise in mass distribution and sharing of social media content across almost all mediums, especially Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat and LinkedIn. While these social networks are powerful communication devices that allow us to stay in touch with friends and family at any time of the day, their usage has also adopted a social currency based on the interactions your posts receive from your peers.
Regardless of what you think about the personal and cultural significance our social media profiles seem to have in this world, the direction social media is heading in our daily personal lives is irreversible. With that said, however, it is always okay to bash on social media frequenters, though we know you will be the one to post the first picture of you doing something fun and for the first time in three months.
Here is your forecast for what to expect on the networks over the break.
Snapchat: Good boys
During your studies at Butler and the three months since the last time you saw your parents, siblings and old friends, the part of your home life you realize is the most difficult to be separated from is a four legged, semi-sentient mammal that definitely descended from heaven. The “snap story with dogs after being home for precisely five minutes” is a go-to for many students, but it is content anyone can appreciate. The more dog content we can get on social media, the better off the world will be.
Instagram: A lot of fuggin sand
Beaches. Bathing suits. Battlestar Galactica. I know that is not how the line goes, but forgive me; I am in my basement avoiding the polar vortex and binging “The Office” for the ninth time this lifetime while seemingly the entire Butler student body occupies various beaches across North America.
With the exception of alarming levels of dehydration and sunburn, beaches are pretty cool. Plus, they are a great template for the social media aesthetic you work so hard to keep up. A beach matches any aesthetic, but this content is not where you find well-crafted, genuinely clever captions to promote them. Thank you for telling me it is not snowing, and you are having a “Fyre” weekend.
Irish Cultural Appropriation
I wonder what 19th century Irish immigrants would think if they saw today’s celebration of their patron saint. When you consider the hibernophobia of our ancestors and the discrimination that Irish Catholics endured, the irony of how Americans now observe St. Patrick’s Day is laughable. All things considered, this Christian celebration is heavily photographed by green-clad, plastered twentysomethings alongside the greened-out Chicago river backdrop. Do not forget to make an allusion to Guinness beer or share what percent Irish Ancestry.com said you are in the caption.
LinkedIn: The job announcement
The social network that reminds you that the working-class world awaits you after college. The only spring breaks you will have after you graduate require using precious vacation days and will inevitably be filled with chauffeuring your offspring somewhere fun during their recess from school.
Anyway, the employment networking tool is a resource for many students in not only finding jobs and internship opportunities, but for having a profile that you can share in a professional environment. One that lacks the explicit, borderline-incriminating content from the photos and memes on your other social media profiles.
We have reached the time of the year when users announce their new places of employment, but it is also that time — if you are like me — to scramble through the job search tool to find something to do during the summer because not hearing back from the internships you have applied to is keeping you up at night. Keep applying.