Be happy with yourself before seeking out a relationship

By Tori Farr

Go to Twitter, search “#TeamForeverAlone” and you will find a seemingly endless amount of boys and girls complaining about temporary problems and concluding these will lead to their permanent destiny: “forever alone.”
However, I am sure most of us do not need to search in order to find these particular tweets. I, personally, know that I see a plethora of them on my own timeline.
So why is it that even with all the great things life has to offer individuals, we as human beings feel not only a desire, but a necessity to be partnered with another?
We can focus our energy on a sport, a musical instrument, an internship or career path, or the community. Yet our generation as a whole still tends to radiate a need for companionship before a quarter of our life is over.
And yes, I will admit that, coming from me as someone who is in a relationship, this may sound a little hypocritical.
But I also recognize my own worth as an individual, and I am starting to worry that this generation is lacking in that department.
Junior Nikki Risselmann said that she has never had a serious relationship.
“I feel like, a lot of times, people desire a partner because they are looking for value in a relationship rather than finding the value in themselves,” said Risselmann.
Does this mean that you should never be in a relationship until you’ve completely found who you are? No. Quite frankly, I don’t believe we ever stop finding out things about ourselves.
But, I do believe we all are sometimes at fault for pretending to have an interest or convincing ourselves that something is our personal interest in order to impress somebody whom we find attractive.
And if you are reading this, thinking, “I have never lied to a crush about something that I like just to get them to like me,” you are either lying or are a lot better person than a lot of our generation—including me.
Yes, we all complain about relationship struggles at one point  or another in our lives. But making a habit of it or suggesting that a relationship defines us is a problem.
One college girl on Twitter went as far as to put “#TeamSingle” and “#TeamForeverAlone” in her twitter bio, as if the fact that she is not in a relationship defines her as a person.
If you are going to be happy in a relationship and share your life with somebody, you must first be happy with yourself and have your own life to share.

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