“Almost everyone will have someone at the dinner table — whether it be your weird cousin, your aggressively racist pee-paw or your fire and brimstone, Westboro-lite aunt Karen — who will not hesitate to say something out of pocket.”
“As spooky season reaches its zenith, you may wonder what this Halloweekend has in store for you. As luck would have it, the stars have answers for you — probably.”
“What is this awful feeling that seems to plague our campus? Good old-fashioned, all-American, soul-sucking burnout.”
“Following her death, many have condemned the queen as a figurehead for numerous imperialist atrocities, and some have engaged in outright celebration.”
Delicious? Questionably. Inexpensive? Not really. Homophobic? Undoubtedly.
Here are five completely useless investments Butler could make that are still more useful than a new president’s house.
Here are your super-duper, totally awesome semi-truthful horoscopes for the start of the Fall 2022 semester.
I have spoken to the stars and they spoke back to me — but I forgot to write down what they said, so here’s some stuff I came up with.
A student-run group has recently resurfaced under the name “proudamericabu” and continues to post a wealth of nationalist nonsense with a fun splash of transphobia, misogyny and capitalist bootlicking.
I get it, most people simply don’t possess the overwhelming psychic power that it takes to accurately read vibes. But I do. So, I present to you the definitive and factual ranking of Butler’s academic buildings based on their vibes.