The stars’ guide to staying home: an astrological approach to quarantine

Photo courtesy of the Hubble Space Telescope. 

MADI BLAIR | OPINION COLUMNIST | meblair@butler.edu

With half a week of sheltering in place left on campus, cabin fever is setting in for many of us. Finding a method of coping with the current situation is therefore of utmost importance, but it can be difficult to pinpoint exactly which adjustments best serve your individual needs. Thankfully, we have the stars to help guide us in our approach. Here’s what they have to say. 

Aries

Being stuck at home for extended periods of time can be stifling for you, if not infuriating. When you’re feeling chaotic or jittery, channel it into something that’ll get it out of your system. Go for a run or find another activity that will burn some energy off in a tangible way. Try not to punch any walls.

Taurus

Like homebody Cancer, you have the potential to thrive under the current circumstances. This is your time to get through all those shows you’ve started and snacks you’ve stockpiled. Maybe watch a rom-com or 12. Just make sure to get some work done in between binge-watching sessions.

Gemini

You feel your best when you can bounce all the ideas swirling in your head off of others. Virtual study groups and Zoom meetups will be your best friends, both to retain your academic attention span and to preserve your sanity in a time where you can’t have your usual spirited debates in person.

Cancer

I can almost feel you worrying from here, so this is your daily reminder that everything will be okay. Lean into your stay-at-home tendencies and try to appreciate all the free time you have now that you’re not rushing from place to place. Do things that soothe you; stress baking is a good outlet, even if it’s just a microwaved mug brownie.

Leo

I know there’s not much I can say to console you, Leo. Your extroversion quotas are far from being met right now, but just remember that nothing is forever, and that the only way out is through. In the meantime, try some positive affirmations; it might help to give yourself some of the validation you normally look to others for.

Virgo

There’s a fine line between healthy caution and neuroticism. If you’re going through Lysol at an alarming rate or your hands are dried out from sanitizing, I understand your concern, but try to rein it in. Distractions are key for you right now; practicing productive procrastination will keep you feeling on track without giving you too much time to dwell.

Libra

Close your online shopping tabs and put down the debit card. Retail therapy is great until you stress-buy $300 worth of skincare from a company with a no-return policy. Also, I know you feel isolated right now, but don’t text your ex, no matter how much you want the attention. It’s not worth it.

Scorpio

You know that one weird niche topic you have an inexplicable fascination with? Now is the time to dive deep. Getting really into upcycling clothes or calligraphy or the history of 14th-century Europe will give you an outlet and a focus for all the intensity you haven’t been able to expend in social settings.

Sagittarius

Restlessness will occur if it hasn’t already set in; try to walk the line between resisting it and getting stuck in it. Activities like board games — with people you live with or online — can be a great place to find some excitement in what might otherwise feel like monotony. And like fellow fire sign Aries, getting out and moving your body will get you out of your mental rut.

Capricorn

Things feel out of control for you right now. Fight the urge to micromanage yourself and others. There will be time for you to live your hyper-productive CEO dreams; if you feel like you’re throwing your life down the drain because you watched three episodes of New Girl today, remember that you have time and give yourself a pass.

Aquarius

I’d tell you what I told Scorpio, but I know that you’ve been neck-deep in your particular niche interest since at least March. Therefore, my advice is moderation. Punctuate your YouTube marathon of cult documentaries with some Khan Academy videos, or do a problem set in between Wikipedia deep dives. Keep it interesting but keep it productive.

Pisces

You have a particular tendency to worry about everyone but yourself in times like these. Turn some of that attention inward. Treat yourself with the care and concern you extend to your close friends. It doesn’t have to be anything grandiose, although I know that’s what you’d do for others; just making sure you’re speaking to yourself with kindness is a great start.

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