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ABIGAIL PLUFF | OPINION COLUMNIST | apluff@butler.edu

Full disclosure: I am not a licensed therapist. Honestly, I am not licensed in anything whatsoever. I’m just a gal with lots of opinions who enjoys giving unsolicited advice to almost anyone around me. So, if this is adverse advice, you can’t sue me or my place of work. Sorry!

“I’ve been working on putting myself first more, but sometimes it’s hard for me to treat myself when I feel like I haven’t done anything to earn it. Do you have any tips on how to stop feeling guilty for taking care of myself?” -Loyal Reader

The days are getting shorter, the wind is getting chillier, and it’s starting to feel wrong that I’m not hibernating these fall and winter months away. Getting out of bed seems to get tougher daily, and my mental health needs a bit more work than it did in the sunnier, warmer months.

Sometimes, I struggle with my worthiness. Do I deserve to spend time on self care? What makes me good enough to pay attention to?

However, I have to keep telling myself that I’m worthy of happiness. If something will bring me joy, I am worthy of receiving it.

I deserve attention when I want it, and to be left alone when I don’t. I deserve to receive love in the ways that feel best to me. I deserve to feel safe and supported.

I deserve to put in work for my future. I deserve to work hard for what I want, but also to take a nap if I need one. I deserve cake and support and to cry it out if that’s what feels good.

I deserve these things simply because I am a human being that is worthy of joy.

There is no category you have to be in or quota you have to meet to be worthy of self care and love, you just are.

You don’t have to do anything to “earn” spending time caring for yourself. Simply breathing is enough.

You are worthy, even on your bad days, at your best and your worst.

You are worthy of everything you have ever wanted, despite it sometimes being difficult to convince yourself of the validity of your dreams.

You are worthy of what you have been given, and what you’ve worked for, even if no one else is saying so.

You are worthy, period.

You deserve friendship and joy and to be able to take a deep breath and relax.

If you ever forget your worthiness, just shoot me, your personal hype-man, an email.

You, you worthy little guy, are valuable, valid and loved,

Abby

If you have a question that you’d like to see discussed in Ask Abby, feel free to contact me via email, carrier pigeon or telepathy.